Darkness

By M. Jay Mansfield 

 

why do I allow myself to hope
why do I dare to dream
just another chance for god to fail me
just another day to die

a brilliant flower blooming in a sea of filth
to be seen by only sightless beasts
golden glimmers of chance
destroyed again by time

each minute a glimmer of hope cascading down the waterfall of regret
hope, useless hope, pooling at the bottom like a cesspool
no chlorine can seem to sterilize it it sits there shimmering mocking me
year after year dream after dream mixed together in one evil slurry

leaning over the pool breathing in the foul stench of broken dreams
I look my shimmering reflection in its soulless eyes
rainbow hued grins of a mad man stare back at me
briefly I almost succumb to the intoxicating lure of the dreams

but beneath the pretty rainbow I can see the dark oiliness of truth
I can taste the false hope and it taste like bile
spitting my vengeance into the dream spattering its face
ruining the image the way that it ruined my life with its false hope

I turn and walk away into the darkness
The darkness never lied to me the way the dreams did
it never promised me glory or beauty
it always comforted me with its unknown terrors

when I was at my lowest it cradled me and it absorbed me
even in its darkest evil wings of hate and despair it didn`t lie
how comforting truth can be, even ugly truth
my friend, stark bloodied and beaten Truth

©11/9/2012 MJMansfield aka FireEagle

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Click on M. Jay Mansfield  for bio and list of other works published by Pencil Stubs Online.